Expressing Emotions Supports Our Mental Health
Expressing Emotions Supports Our Mental Health
“Our feelings are our most genuine paths to knowledge” Audre Lorde
“Music is what feelings sound like out loud….” Georgia Cates
“The worst pain is when you have many things in your mind and have no one to share” Unknown
I find that when I am very emotional and hurt, playing music helps me process my feelings like no other medium. Attuning to my feelings through music brings me awareness of the emotions that I am feeling, and music creates the space for me to compassionately acknowledge my feelings are valid and important. Simply giving myself this space and time to feel my feelings reduces the intensity of my feelings and comforts me. I also journal while listening to music and this combination allows me to go deeper inside to find where and what is causing me pain. Just as our bodies tell us something is wrong with a fever, our emotions give us important information about ourselves and processing them allows us to understand the information that our body is telling us what is needed for our mental health.
Weather sharing my feelings through music, journaling, art, or verbally sharing with a safe person, I am soothed and more emotionally regulated to move forward. My thoughts flow freer, I no longer feel stuck, and I can move forward with more confidence.
When feelings are allowed to be expressed with no internal or external influences of judgement or expectations, then there is self-acceptance of the emotional state we are in and this allows for release of our intense emotions. This leads to more emotional stability and mental health.
The reason therapy is very effective is that this same process occurs when a therapist provides unconditional regard and acceptance with no judgment by allowing a safe environment for the client to share their emotions and feelings. This is the foundation for healing in therapy.
Letting our feelings out has a way of soothing us. When we sit with our feelings and with another person and feel their feelings, this reduces the intensity of those feelings after sharing and brings us to a more regulated state. Knowing that although we may still be in pain, yet we are not suffering alone brings us ease and peace. Being heard and seen are the gifts of therapy to have someone walk alongside your pain so that you are not suffering alone. Being heard builds our resilience to move through our struggles and difficult emotions in a healthier way when we have an outlet to share our feelings. Bringing something that is deep within us that is causing pain to the surface into the light with someone safe has a way of diffusing the feelings and removes the distorted feelings or makes those feelings seem not as big or as scary as they were when they were deep within us. Feelings need to be let out like steam in a boiling kettle. If we do not allow our feelings to come out, eventually they will explode. Sometimes instead of addressing our feelings we may unknowingly avoid them.
“Numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it.”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
“People go through so much pain trying to avoid pain.” – Neil Strauss
Resources to explore or express your feelings and to better listen to your emotions and others’ emotions:
6 worksheets to express your emotions: https://positivepsychology.com/express-feelings/
The Rabbit Listened by Cori Doerrfeld is about how to comfort and heal the people in your life, by taking the time to carefully, lovingly, gently listen.
Free Worksheets to explore your emotions and feelings: https://www.choosingtherapy.com/therapy-worksheets/emotions/
Emotions Exploration Worksheets to understand your emotions, emotions log, emotion myths and fats, emotions diary, and distress tolerance skills to manage intense overwhelming emotions:
https://www.therapistaid.com/therapy-worksheets/emotions/none
If you don’t already have one, consider reaching out to a qualified therapist who can walk alongside you on this journey. At CIC, we are here for you.
Meet KC
About The Author
KC is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist (APCC20046, AMFT156928) at the Center for Integrative Change. She trained in EMDR, ACT, DBT, CBT, MI, Solution Focused Therapy, Mindfulness, Narrative Therapy, and is in training in sex therapy and IFS. She loves working with couples, children, teens, individuals and groups who want to experience the life that they envision for themselves. KC feels rewarded and fulfilled when she facilitates change towards hope, healing, peace, and wholeness in her client’s lives. In her down time, KC enjoys spending time with her family (husband, adult children, grandchildren), gardening, swimming, and traveling.
