An IFS New Year: Honoring the Parts of You That Got You Here
An IFS New Year: Honoring the Parts of You That Got You Here
As many of us know, January often comes with a lot of noise about “starting fresh” or becoming a better version of yourself. While this kind of reflection can be helpful, the pressure to immediately change as soon as January 1st arrives can quietly dismiss everything you’ve already survived, learned, and experienced.
Instead of rushing into resolutions, I invite you to see this new season as an opportunity to pause — to look back with curiosity and appreciation, to notice the parts of you that showed up even when things were hard, and to thank them for getting you here.
Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a therapy approach that helps people understand their inner world by recognizing the different parts that show up in daily life. For example, it might be the anxious part that worries about the future, the frustrated part that feels stuck with family patterns, the part that pushes through even when it’s exhausted, or the part that shuts down to avoid getting hurt. Each part has a reason for being there, even when its reactions feel confusing or unhelpful.
The start of a new year can be a natural time to slow down and check in with these parts, noticing what they’ve been carrying and what they might need now. This year, rather than trying to change or silence them, we can choose to listen with curiosity and compassion. Below are some gentle reframing and journal prompts to get you started — remember, there’s no right answer, simply curiosity.
Thought Reframing: A Different Way to Reflect on the Past Year
When we look back at the year, it’s easy to focus on what didn’t happen or where we fell short. But parts work invites a different lens. You can ask yourself, what parts were working hard to protect me? Which part carried the load when things felt overwhelming?
Some parts may have pushed you to keep going. Others may have encouraged rest, distraction, or withdrawal. None of these parts are “bad”, they were doing the best they could with what they had at the time.
Reflection doesn’t have to mean judgment. It can be an act of acknowledgment and getting to know yourself better.
Journal Prompts: Honoring Your Parts
You might try journaling with these prompts, taking your time and noticing what comes up without forcing answers:
Which parts were most active this past year?
Notice the emotions, reactions, or patterns that showed up repeatedly.
Example: “My anxious part showed up whenever my partner didn’t reply to a text
for hours, making me worry I had done something wrong or wasn’t loved.”Which parts helped me through tough moments?
Identify the parts that helped you and what they were trying to do for you.
Example: “My determined part helped me speak up when I felt my sister was
criticizing me. This helped me to not shut down or retreat.”Were any parts of me tired, overwhelmed, or unheard?
Check in with parts that may have been struggling. Ask: what age is this part, and what was it trying to protect me from?
Example: “While planning the holiday dinner with my parents, I felt frustrated
and like I was 12 years old again. This frustrated 12-year-old part kept stepping
in to protect me from feeling rejected by my parents or ‘not good enough.”What do these parts need from me now?
Think about how you could respond to them with care, support, or understanding. Remember, these parts are often younger; address them with the same kindness you’d give a child or teenager.
Example: “My insecure part might need me to remind it that feeling nervous
doesn’t mean I’m failing, and that I am worthy of love even when I make
mistakes.”Is there a part of me I feel proud of, even if it usually goes unnoticed?
Acknowledge the strengths, perseverance, or courage of these parts. Celebrate them for showing up.
Example: “I’m proud of my resilient part that stayed present and calm during a
heated conversation with my partner, even though I felt like running away.”
If you’d like further support exploring parts work or moving through the year with more clarity and care, the Center for Integrative Change can offer a safe, supportive space to do just that.
A trusted therapist can help you notice the protective parts of yourself, understand what they’ve been trying to communicate, and respond to them with compassion rather than judgment.
Old patterns can feel impossible to shift on your own, but together, we can begin to uncover the resilience you may not have realized was there and deepen your connection to yourself and others. You don’t have to navigate your inner world alone — the new year can be a chance to honor all the parts of you with understanding, curiosity, and care.
If you’re ready to take the next step, we’d love to meet you! Reach out today to schedule a free consultation call.
Meet Tess Krimmer
About The Author
Tess Krimmer, MA, AMFT (AMFT157358), is supervised by Jeremy Mast, MS, MDiv, LMFT, CSAT, CPTT (CA90961), and earned her Master of Arts in Clinical Psychology from Pepperdine University. Recognizing that healing can often feel overwhelming and uncertain, Tess offers a supportive, judgment-free space where clients are invited to gently explore and make sense of the parts of themselves that may feel confusing, painful, or difficult to face. When appropriate, she integrates EMDR techniques to assist clients in processing difficult memories and easing emotional distress, empowering them to build a stronger sense of self and more fulfilling connections along the way. Off the clock: When not in session, I enjoy trail running, woodwork, and lounging at the beach with my black lab, Theo.
